I Would Have Said You
by LeoOsaka Bakura's stalker
Summary: What if Rude had asked Reno who he liked? What would Reno have said? Slight rating for Reno's language. Shonen ai theme


_Leo: Bored. That's all there is to it. This is a little one shot-ish deal and more practice with a non-dialogue story. I haven't done one of those in a long time and I thought it would be a nice change. This is from Reno's point of view and it's very Turk centric. It's got a shonen ai theme to it too. A sort of Reno+Tseng deal. I wrote it for my own practice, so if someone actually likes it, that only serves as a bonus!_

**I Would Have Said You**

I've always found you to be an amazing person. Always so calm and collected even when I'm panicked and acting like a ten year old. Calm even when we're in trouble and there seems to be no chance to pull ourselves out of it. Or when we're getting lectured or reprimanded because we managed to fuck something up. You always took the fall for us too. You cared about us more than you did the company. We were your family. It's a funny way to put it to a group of assassins, kidnappers and espionage masters. You loved us. You still love us, as tattered and broken down as we are. You're the mentor. The lifeblood of us. I bet you can't imagine that, now can you? You were always humble like that too.

I'm not professional. Not like you. You were something I couldn't be. So I left you alone up there on that pedestal of complete perfectionism. I knew I could never be anything like that. I didn't even bother to try. I was always satisfied just getting my ass chewed out by you, which you were also great at doing. There's nothing you can't do perfectly, is there? But you know, I was okay with that. I didn't mind. Hell, when you slammed me in the head with the wastebasket for not bothering to knock, I was okay with it. In a way it showed me that you were human under all of that perfection. But no less perfect for being so.

It was rare to see a humorous side out of you. But it was there and I loved it. I felt so close to you when you were a little bit more laid back. I had a blast on the days you'd help me play horrible pranks on Rude. I remember that day you'd managed to convince some old guy with a bad case of Alzheimer's that Rude was his long lost child. That was funny, because they kinda looked similar. I still chuckle every time I think about that. Though I think it's more hysterical that they still keep in contact. You were always so convincing like that. So sure of yourself. You know, I still have people refer to me as 'Tseng'. I bet people still call you 'Reno' huh? It still baffles me that people fell for the identity switch. Talk about your practical joke. Then again that was nothing compared to the 'Lacy', 'Laura' and 'Lina' joke we had for a while. Yeah, I still get called 'Lina' every now and then. So, how've you been 'Lacy'? I hear 'Laura's' still mad because I broke his shades and smacked him in the head a few times. He thinks that was on accident. We both know better.

You're different than you used to be. At least I've noticed. You watch more and work less. I suppose that's what's become of us Turks, now that ShinRa doesn't really need us. I often wonder why they keep us at all. I guess we're just too damn sexy to let go. Besides, I don't think 'Lisa' wants to let us go. After all don't you know the big bad President of ShinRa needs his entertainment? And watching you kick the crap out of me on pent up rage sure the hell amuses someone. You never were good at that temper of yours. But that doesn't make you less perfect. That just makes you scary.

Yes, I find you frightening. I don't like it when you call me to your office. One of these days I'll walk into your office and never return. Whether that's from the scalping you'll undoubtedly give me, or your desk that wants to take my soul, or just from my being a dumb ass and tripping and splitting my head wide open, I don't know. But some how I know I'll die in your office. It's a curse. I just know it.

You know, sometimes I have to wonder. Rude said something interesting to me, years ago. He said that you had a thing for that Aerith chick. Some how I don't believe that, unless you're a really kinky bastard who likes to smack his chicks around. Which I wouldn't dare put it passed you. You're a weirdo deep down inside. Actually I'm betting you wouldn't even have to go that deep to find that weirdo lurking under that snazzy suit. Ah hell, we'll just dub you a weirdo now and save the expedition funds.

Heh, Elena really looks up to you. She's got it for you bad. I wonder if you've noticed. Or maybe you don't like blondes. That almost seems plausible. After all you didn't really take well to Elena's sister either, even though she all but crawled down your pants. Some how that image is disturbing me as well as giving me the urge to chuckle.

I guess I haven't been the easiest lackey ever. I like to harass you as much as you like to torture me. Sometimes it's just too boring being professional. And don't even try to tell me that you thought getting absolutely smashed and fist fighting each other in the cafeteria at nine in the morning was professional. Despite you kicking my ass, handing my dignity to me in your kung fu fist and tacking ignominy all over my face it was a memory I think I'd relive. Watching your boss actually do what he's been thinking for five years is what I like to think of as 'kick ass'. Literally.

You tell me I talk a lot and you almost seem to look down upon it. But I have to be the voice that makes up for the lack of noise I get from you and Rude. I guess I need to hear things. I'm a vocal kinda guy and I just can't get enough when you or Rude speak. And god forbid you both speak at the same time! I think I suffocate when that happens. Luckily it doesn't happen much. Or I'd die.

Let's not all celebrate at once at that idea. Because you're a long ways from getting rid of me. I'll live for a long time you know. I'm too damn hard to kill. Just like you. I guess there's one thing we have in common. I guess that's one thing you managed to teach me. Aside from the fact that you really shouldn't put baking soda and vinegar together in a bottle, close it and hold it. You taught me the hard way on that one. My hands still itch every now and then just from the memory. You've always had that effect. Making me remember things that I shouldn't.

Like the times you managed to look so badass I could have thrown up in the presence of your incredible coolness. I particularly loved that time you had that guy at gunpoint. I'll remember that line forever. 'Ask me how many people I've shot in the face. Don't know? Hell I don't either, but you just added one more to the number.' Bang! That was the most graphic, and gut wringing thing I've ever seen, but you made it seem just too damn cool. As grotesque as that scene was to my non-Turk-at-the-time eyes, I love that memory.

I realized that you're just like me too. Shoot and ask questions later. If only I could make myself as smart as you. Then maybe you'd take me more seriously. Or maybe you do. Maybe you just don't want to let me know. You've got a habit of doing that you know. Telling me I'm doing a shitty job, while praising me to others. I guess you're just keeping my head in check. God knows I don't need a bigger ego then I've given myself.

Bottom line is, you're my fucking idol, my friend, my family and god knows what other title I can pin on you. I guess that scare of you being dead in that damn Temple of the Ancients and then once again in the Northern Crater frightened me into realization.

You know how I told you that Rude had mentioned you had a thing for Aerith? Well, that was spawned because I asked him, 'who did he like?'. He said that Tifa chick. Then commented on how Elena liked you and you had that thing for Aerith. The subject fell apart there. And part of me is glad he didn't get the chance to turn that question back on me.

Because I would have said you.

* * *

_Leo: Oddly not my style, yet oddly enjoyable to write. I'll admit, while it's shorter than what I usually do it was a nice fresh breath. Tell me what you think guys! I like to know when I'm doing something you'd like to see more of!_


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